Thursday, March 10, 2011

Mommy Guilt...my baby doesn't have any friends!!

My Munchkin is the coolest. He is the most laid back, funny, happy baby. He makes the cutest zerbert/raspberry noises while he intensely focuses on playing with his toys. He is friendly towards all people who smile or talk to him in stores. Recently we attended our second play date with several of my former coworkers and their children. The babies ranged from 6 months to almost a year old. It seemed that we all got pregnant right around the same time. The first time we had a play date, Munchkin was cool as a cucumber. He wasn't sitting up yet, so he spent the majority of his time laying on the floor, or bouncing in the bouncer seat. Other babies were a little overwhelmed by all the action and noise. Not my baby. He had a blast.

This last time, not so much.

He was sort of a weepy, fussy mess almost the entire time. Granted, the play date was running into his nap time, and it was almost his nursing time.

But I left that last play date panicking. As I have been reviewing our daily schedule and life, I've realized that although I do plan around Munchkin's nap and meal times, I haven't really been doing a very good job at planning activities for him.

I signed him up for a story time at our local library a few months ago, but we've never been able to make it there. In my defense, the story time for his age group starts at 9:30. Exactly when he is usually snoozing away for his first morning nap.

We've visited the zoo with friends and their kids. But the kids spent the whole time in their strollers. It's not like they were actually interacting.

I've had a standing weekly appointment with a girlfriend of mine to walk. But her little one is now 2 years old and not exactly interested in hanging with a Munchkin who can't keep up and play on the playground with him. Can't say that I blame him, either.

I'm feeling a little selfish, a little foolish, a little clueless. Selfish because I feel like I've been putting my needs before his- carting him all over creation to run hither and yon, instead of enrolling him in some class to meet other babies. Foolish because I feel like all other mommies know to do these kinds of things, and maybe I'm late to the game. Clueless because I am not sure where to start, how it's going to go, and if we can afford to enroll him in anything.

Thankfully, we have an all ready paid up gym membership, which does provide child care. I think I'm going to try and swallow my Mommy Anxiety and try it out next week. I'm not making any promises- the first couple of times may only be for 10 or 20 minutes, but hey, it's a start, right? It'll get us out of the house, mommy gets to exercise, Munchkin gets to learn that when I drop him off somewhere that I am ALWAYS going to come back, and maybe he'll get to play with some other babies close to his age.

Another good thing is that a few of the places I've researched- My Gym and Kindermusik-allow parents to bring their children for a free preview class before enrolling. I am extremely happy about this. This way I can gauge how beneficial and fun these programs will be to the Munchkin's well being.

Lastly, I've joined a local mommy's group. So far I've enjoyed the two "Mommies" nights with these ladies, and I hope I can start bringing Munchkin to some of the play dates and make friends.

There are lots of opportunities out there. One of the biggest things is that all of these opportunities take me well out of my comfort zone. I can be extremely introverted, self-conscious and awkward in new social situations. I am just holding on to the belief that will all of the opportunties around us, that the Munckin and I will find a few that will really fit our needs and help us both grow. Wish me luck!

1 comment:

  1. Don't worry too much about it! You are very attentive to your little guy and are a super mommy to him. I think you will see a need for him to have friends more when he is a little older. I think us mommies need the playdates more than the kiddos, especially when you stay at home. As far as mommy guilt, I still experience that about different things in J's life, but we just do the best we can, right?!?!

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